Sometimes relationships work. Oftentimes — they don’t. The reasons are complex.
Relationships require constant work. The work is a constant effort to keep the connection a positive one.
We all have our ups and downs; if that was not the case — what would we work towards?
The effort to keep relationships constantly moving positively can become a battle of wear and tear.
A loose thread in a relationship can cause frustration and disappointment. Leaving a couple faced with a problem calling for — resolution.
Feelings are — strong emotions that keep us attached. It’s not always easy to remedy what we feel when our ego has been bruised by the one we love.
At the moment of feeling bruised emotions, choice — comes into play. Am I going to hang in there and work this out, or do I walk away?
In the moment of choice, we come face to face with — self. Like a reflection in a mirror, we glimpse who “self” is being.
If we’re looking at “self” and not the other person, we reflect on our own actions.
Think about it for a moment!
Isn’t it true that when you have an argument or disagreement and temporarily distance yourself to reflect on the situation, you’re left with “yourself” to ponder the details?
Within those moments of pondering, don’t you see — yourself? Aren’t you evaluating how you might have acted or reacted to cause the thread to loosen?
When I look at myself in a relationship that reveals to me, I’m constantly learning and growing.
Life is teaching me what it wants me to learn to become a more knowledgeable — wiser person.
It’s only when I don’t see myself — due to denial, pride, selfishness, or naivety that the thread in the relationship continues to become unraveled because I’m not growing. I’m not becoming more responsible and accountable.
Ultimately, the relationship is severed due to a lack of not seeing “me.” That's not to say that the relationship is being severed solely on me not seeing myself. My significant other might not be willing to look at —himself.
The fact remains — no matter what the reasons might be — if you’re observing yourself in the relationship, your reflection will bring you face to face with the inner you and cause you to grow beyond whatever the reason might be.
The same stands true for relationships that work. No matter the reasons, you were constantly looking at “self” along the way, or it wouldn’t have worked.
Each person in the relationship needs to come face to face with “self” to make things better. Then, perhaps they can come back — together!